Gotta love them Hip Hop Republicans dawg
M.C. Steele Pants (also known as Republican National Committee Chairman Michael Steele) ’bout to unstarch the drawers on that stiff-assed elephant, y’all. Gonna make that Grand Ole Party party like it’s 18 …I mean 2009!
Hey, you can’t say those Republicans don’t know how to follow along and take a cue. When it looked like there was no hope left for the nation and it was about to explode into flames, who you gonna call? OBAMA! That’s right, folks. When the shit gets too deep, you know it’s time to call in the brothers to get you out, ’cause you know we been in so deep for so long that we damned near know how to do the backstroke in it while whistling Dixie and doin’ the laundry. All you gotta do is go back to the Great Depression and look at the different reactions between whites and blacks. White folks were jumpin off buildings. Black folks were trying to figure out what the hell had changed. Still gettin lynched, still a Ku Klux Klan, still America. So NOW you callin’ this a Depression?
So anyway, Obama wins the White House by a LARGE margin. Wasn’t even close. You figure it’s beginning to dawn on someone in the GOP that maybe the Great Caribou Hunter wasn’t exactly the right response to this thing. You figure maybe they’re thinking “Maybe it wouldn’t have been such a bad idea to have at least one black person speak at the Convention. Nothing wrong with pretending to be diverse.” Because, well, they got spanked.
Suddenly, the new face of the Republican Party is MC Steele Pants. Oh he may look just as starched and uptight as the rest of his brethren in the GOP, but that’s just the disguise. This is the Republican version of The Dark Knight, which means that in this movie the Joker is the hero – and the hero is MC Steele Pants. Talkin ’bout he gonna take the GOP hip hop. I tell you that MC Steele Pants is a baaaaaad mutha (shut yo mouf).
“There was underlying concerns we had become too regionalized and the party needed to reach beyond our comfort” zones, said Steele in an interview with the Washington Times, citing defeats in such states as Virginia and North Carolina. “We need messengers to really capture that region – young, Hispanic, black, a cross section … We want to convey that the modern-day GOP looks like the conservative party that stands on principles. But we want to apply them to urban-surburban hip-hop settings.”
But, he elaborated with a laugh, “we need to uptick our image with everyone, including one-armed midgets.”
OK, I’m not even gonna try and figure out what the hell one-armed midgets have to do with hip-hop or expanding the RNC base. Who am I to question the Joker? But I do wonder how this is gonna play out with, well, the rest of the Republicans? I mean, I hear him woofin’ now, but does he know who it is he’s talking to? Does he seriously think that draping the RNC with a soundtrack from 50 Cent (or whoever) is gonna lure in the kids? Or is gonna pull them away from Obama after they flooded the polls for him in 2008? Do they think that because the guy who suggested this idea has a black face that’s gonna fool somebody? Do they really think we can’t figure out why they did this, and do they really think we don’t know that Steele owes his appointment to Obama? Which, all by itself, should kinda take the air out of his bombast?
Then again, the Joker always was crazy…